Homophobic House

by N.A.R.P

I lived in a small town full of culture, where diversity didn’t fit. I was a 6 year old child when I realized how homophobic people can be. Childhood is kind of a confusing stage, I did not know what was right and what wasn’t. Older generations in my family would talk about the LGBTQ community as if they were talking about demons. Sadly, I was kind of being homophobic when I laughed about all those silly jokes. When I grew up a little I was disgusted by the way they spoke to gay men and lesbian women.

I started to think of the damage they have done and how blind I was. I realized that my family is hurting people by calling them names which is pretty much the same I went through in school, “bullying”.

I felt terrible when I continued to hear how my family members called a young man “butterfly” as he walk towards home. I didn’t laugh, not anymore, I was mad at the fact that I know the bullies and these bullies are my family.

School was no different, my classmate would bully lesbians as much as they could. They knew who the lesbian in the classroom was so they planned what to do with her after class. It was kind of traumatizing having to tell my cousins about it so that they did something but well, they didn’t care.

My little boy cousin grabbed my aunt’s makeup and he started to put the lipstick on his tiny lips when I hear my grandma shout “ Are you a woman?, don’t you have balls?”

I was feeling sad, at the fact that they knew very little and that me at a young age knew more than them. I knew that there is nothing wrong with wearing a skirt or using makeup but to them, if you were a boy then you are turning into a disgrace for the family. To me, all of this sounds absurd. I never felt free to express myself, all I did was to hear them speak and keep quiet. Many people in town had to leave because of that fact. I felt better when I heard that they became transexual, gay and lesbian and that they were living their best lives. They deserve that, we all deserve to be free and happy.

It is way too sad when a woman doesn’t support her children, they seem like toxic men bringing up their toxic masculinity. I was tired enough when I confronted them and I told them how stupid I thought they were. However, they all just ignored me and said that I was too young to know. Some of us have been there, not because we are part of the LGBTQ community but because we are the ones supporting the movement.

My house was the heart of homophobia, sexism and much more.